Sarah & Christopher~ 2

With Kaitlyn, I was excited to apply what I learned from my first go around.  Since Tyler was 5 weeks early, my mom flew in before my due date to help with the baby . . . and then a week past my guess date, we still had no newborn for her to help with.  At that point, I took the induction date they scheduled me for, since my helper was leaving in a week and I figured that I had done just fine on the Pitocin the last time around.

The Pit took a bit longer to get in my system and fully kick in, since my body wasn’t in that mode yet, but by noon we were surging regularly.  My favorite moment came at about 2pm or so.  I was aware of a nurse that came in and walked around a bit, checking out the monitors, but I was deeply relaxed and ignored her while I surged.  A few minutes later, Mindy (my midwife who happened to be a former Hypnobirthing teacher herself) came in and rested her hand on mine, signaling that she would like to talk when I was ready.  And when I opened my eyes, I could see she was trying not to laugh.  “You really freaked out a nurse just now, you know that?” Apparently that nurse had gone back to the nurse’s station in shock.  “The monitor shows that her contractions are really strong – but she’s SLEEPING!  Her husband is over there typing away on his iPhone, the TV is running (I had forgotten it was on and muted), and she has music going and she is SLEEPING through the contractions!” Mindy had a great time explaining Hypnobirthing to that nurse and the others that she was chatting with.

Once we got off the Pitocin, we had an hour where Mindy was concerned about a face presentation – but that was cleared by changing positions for a while.  So then I was able to get into the big tub, and it was heaven!  I loved the freedom to adjust my position with each surge.  The only problem was that Timpanogos hospital was so against water births that Mindy wouldn’t even be allowed to assist there again if I birthed in the tub (ridiculous), so she warned me I was to get out the instant I felt the urge to push.

Unfortunately, that meant that when I felt the urge to push at 4:30 or so I had two negative reactions.  First of all, it meant I had to leave that wonderful tub.  And second of all, I suddenly remembered (as though it hadn’t occurred to me in the two years between my births) that pushing Tyler out really hurt (because I had lost my focus and was in panic mode).  I didn’t want more pain.  I was handling the current situation, but I didn’t want pain.

That was, as my husband put it later, when I lost my mind.

After a few pushing surges I finally admitted that I should get out of the tub, but I still tried to deny the urge to push for a few more surges.  And then when the urge got stronger, I looked the midwife in the eye and told her that I didn’t want to push.  I didn’t want my baby to come out.  I wanted her to stay in.  I wanted to stop this whole process and go home.  (My husband tried so hard not to laugh, but nearly lost that battle a few times.)  I clenched that baby inside with all my might.

After a half an hour of failed negotiations, my brilliant midwife convinced me that she could see my bladder was huge (this may or may not have been an outright lie) and that I might feel more comfortable if I could relieve that pressure.  So we headed off to the bathroom.  The surge I had on the middle of our walk there was so powerful that I was squatting down nearly to the floor while my husband held me up.  And once we got there and she tricked me into pushing something else out, my baby girl glided out in two or three surges.  On the toilet.  Well, caught by the midwife over the toilet.

And you know what?  I am totally planning on birthing just like that next time.  The downward position was so much better that lying flat on my back and shoving the baby out the first time.  And I think it really helped that I delayed the pushing process until I was fully open and the baby was ready to come, rather than shoving Tyler out before I was fully open.  And since neither the Hospital nor the midwives have birthing stools, I just might find something else to sit on again.